Car salesman...Another match experiment. I guess dating is like golf, some times you have good day, and sometimes you have a horrible day. This was not a good golf day.
Since it was our first meeting, I wanted to pick a place that was fast and close to my casa. Fast because I didn't want a drawn out experience and close to my house, so could get home fast if it was bad.
As you can see, I always expect the worst. Really, I don't ask for much, since I have been disappointed so many times. This story will explain why I expect the worst!
The Car Salesman was persistent and this was the first red flag. He wanted to meet for breakfast, which was fine. I thought, "Well it could be a good way to start the day and id it wasn't, it would just be a good breakfast.
We said we would meet at 10 am. 10 minutes before 10, I was getting a text message saying he was there at a table. 5 minutes before 10, another text that he was wearing a blue shirt. 2 minutes before another text making sure I was coming. Red flag!
When I got there, he looked just like his picture. He was busy texting me about being 5 minutes late. OK, can you stop texting, I am sitting in front of you!!
If you go on these first dates on Match, Tip: only plan a 1 hour meeting. At least the first time. This will help you both. You might think you're both having a great time, because you are, but the other person might not and be to nice to say anything. So keep it short and sweet. If there is chemistry, there will be a second date and you can make the second date longer.
I could tell this guy would not understand the 1 hour rule, so I went in telling him, I had plans at 11:10. I even had someone to call me at 11:05, to make it look like I had to go. I never really do this but with this one, I had a feeling because of all the am text.
Right away, the Car Salesmen started to talk about being good at selling himself. It's good to be confident but come one relax. You could tell he was very nervous and aware of the time. It was like if a timer was on and he only had one hour to sell a car.
Little did he know that nothing would be sold on that date.
Balans has good breakfast options. I wanted to the basics and ordered the Two Eggs plate , comes with bread and potatoes. That could not take long to make. I was hoping he was not going to order anything complicated because I was not getting a good vibe. Full breakfast is good too.
He seemed to be a normal guy but then the diarrhea of the mouth started. People, go to therapy, don't go on a date an spill all our insecurities and past. I don't want to know about your ex-wife. I don't want to know that you were drunk on the way to your wedding. I don't want to know about the honeymoon. Red flag
What about simple conversation, "what do you do?", "what are your hobbies?"," tell me about your family and friends..." At not time during the hour, was I asked anything about me. In this date, this was fine with me because I didn't want to reveal anything personal.
He asked me if I wanted kids, which I told him yes. He also wanted kids but that he always uses protection. Good for you Car Salesman! Good for you!
I wasn't even thinking about that. Feel much better knowing that your always safe.
He really just needed someone to talk too. It was very obvious! Do I look like a priest?
We were sitting outside, I could not people watch because I was facing the inside. People watching can always help when your on a bad date. It was a bit chilly, and I was getting goosebumps. I grabbed my long sleeve shirt and as I was putting it on, he said, "Wow, your cold!" I thought he had noticed my goosebumps on my arm and agreed with him. After I put on my long sleeve shirt, he again said, "Wow, you are cold!"
I told him that it was kind of chilly and he said "Yeah, I can see your headlights!"
Red flag! Whattttttt!
Tip to men: Don't talk about a woman's nipples on a first date. Not cool!
I looked at him with a horrified face, the waiters saved his day because she brought our food. Really! No comment fool!
After 30 minutes about the ex-wife, we moved on to his ex-live-in girlfriend of 5 years.
Deep thought: "Wow, I wanted to know everything about your past relationships in 1 hour, how did you know!?" Ahhhhhhhhh
Story after story about her, I realized, "Dude, you still like her.!"
I almost told him, "Hey, maybe you will get back with her!"
I was waiting for him to pull out pictures of her. But he never did. I wouldn't have been surprised. Specially when he started to tell me about their sex life. Again, NOT a first date conversation piece! What is wrong with you!! Red flag
Lesson: Watch the red flags. Keep things simple the first date. Telling someone you're divorced or have kids is ok. But sex, nipples etc, not allowed.
Reflection: Being alone not so bad:)
At 11:05 my phone rang! Saved by the bell!!!!
http://www.balans.co.uk/
Sunday, March 28, 2010
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